I am talking to myself. Teaching my soul. Psalm 42

"It's someone ye'll never have heard of. Her name on earth was Sarah Smith and she lived at Golders Green."

"She seems to be ... well, a person of particular importance?"

"Aye. She is one of the great ones. Ye have heard that fame in this country and fame on Earth are two quite different things."

"..And who are all these young men and women on each side?"

"They are her sons and daughters."

"She must have had a very large family, Sir."

"Every young man or boy that met her became her son-even if it was only the boy that brought the meat to her back door. Every girl that met her was her daughter."

"Isn't that a bit hard on their own parents?" "No. There are those that steal other people's children. But her motherhood was of a different kind. Those on whom it fell went back to their natural parents loving them more. Few men looked on her without becoming, in a certain fashion, her lovers. But it was the kind of love that made them not less true, but truer, to their own wives."

Page 176-179, Captivating: Unveiling the mystery of a Woman's Soul

God is good, right? I am in awe how the Lord is pointing the path to me. And I love that God provides ample "light" from His Word to sustain me with each prayer-soaked step that I take.

I just came back from a sort of retreat from Ava's place in Bulacan. I stayed there for three days, and boy I am full. I think I gained a few kilos because her Mom fed me like there's no tomorrow. She even gave me a pretty dress that I'll wear on sunday and "Magenta" (Blue's cousin). But more importantly, I was refreshed by prolonged prayer, devotions and reflection times. We decided beforehand that I can't talk to her while we are there so I had all the time in the world to ponder about a lot of BIG things. I wrote lots of letters. I wrote prayers even. I journaled all I want till I was sleepy and tired from reading and writing. In between reflections and studying, I also took pictures of random things there. I wish I could go back sooner.

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MASTER

MISSION

MATE

I've learned about that concept when I was just barely a two-month-old Christian. It was my discipler who taught me this and it was only now that I've realized the significance of those three words in their proper order. In the Christian walk, mostly teenagers and single adults skip the mission part, and I am guilty of that mindset as well. We go about our walk with Christ consumed by thoughts about matters of the heart when we know for a fact that we are nowhere near ready to commit in an exclusive relationship, let alone be married. I am blessed to have had personal Biblical convictions, to have read IKDG and to have been mentored by Godly women and couples even in the arena of love.

Lord, I heard You. You gave me that verse three times already.

I know my priorities, and I must choose to prioritize my priorities.

I am weak, I am afraid, enable me to obey.

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Hebrews 11:17-19 (New International Version)

¹⁷By faith Abraham, when God tested him, offered Isaac as a sacrifice. He who had received the promises was about to sacrifice his one and only son, ¹⁸even though God had said to him, "It is through Isaac that your offspring^[a] will be reckoned.^[b] ¹⁹Abraham reasoned that God could raise the dead, and figuratively speaking, he did receive Isaac back from death.

Hebrews 12:1-6 (New Living Translation)

¹ Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. ² We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith.^a] Because of the joy^b]awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne. ³ Think of all the hostility he endured from sinful people;^c] then you won’t become weary and give up. ⁴After all, you have not yet given your lives in your struggle against sin.

⁵ And have you forgotten the encouraging words God spoke to you as his children?^d]He said,

“My child,^[e] don’t make light of the Lord’s discipline,
and don’t give up when he corrects you.
⁶ For the Lord disciplines those he loves,
and he punishes each one he accepts as his child.”^f]

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Dearest Aboji,

"This day do I, with the utmost solemnity, surrender myself to thee. I renounce all former lords that have had dominion over me; and I consecrate to thee all that I am, and all that I have; the faculties of my mind, the members of my body, my worldly possessions, my time, and my influence over others; to be all used entirely for thy glory, and resolutely employed in obedience to thy commands, as long as thou continuest me in life; with an ardent desire and humble resolution to continue thine through all the endless ages of eternity; ever holding myself in an attentive posture to observe the first intimations of thy will, and ready to spring forward with zeal and joy to the immediate execution of it.
"To thy direction also I resign myself, and all I am and have, to be disposed of by thee in such a manner as thou shalt in thine infinite wisdom judge most subservient to the purposes of thy glory. To thee I leave the management of all events, and say without reserve, `Not my will, but thine be done,' rejoicing with a loyal heart in thine unlimited government, as what ought to be the delight of the whole rational creation.

PHILIP DODDRIDGE (26 June 1702 – 26 October 1751)

Yours,

Queen